2021 HMN Podcast Episodes

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Episode 333: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Ooze

The results of our Black Friday poll are in and the winner is our inner child, because you voted overwhelmingly for TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES II: THE SECRET OF THE OOZE (1991)! Whether that inner child is still entertained by goofy pratfalls performed by martial artists in foam rubber suits is questionable, but the point is that we're doing what we can to keep you coming back for more in 2022 as we round out this year with some wholesome nostalgia talk. We will be back next week with horror, but this week, Ninja Rap is born!

 
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Episode 332: Silent Night, Deadly Night 3: Better Watch Out

Forget the Elf on the Shelf, the real one to watch out for this holiday season is Bill Moseley with his brain in a see-through plastic hat! Hot from our second annual Geekscape livestream is our discussion of the all-around-crappy SILENT NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT 3: BETTER WATCH OUT (1989) and we want to be totally clear that this was only picked because we've already talked about SNDN4 and 5, and Scott wimped out of watching FEEDERS 2. We really just wanted to check out the directorial prowess of a guy named Monte HELLMAN. We're still not convinced that's a real name...

 
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Episode 331: Piranha (1978)

This show is no stranger to killer animal movies, but you'll be surprised to learn that this week's movie was NOT picked by one of the hosts, but rather our illustrious guest Gelsey Laurie from the podcast Before My Time. She braved the deep end of late 70s Corman schlock and graced us with Joe Dante's directorial debut, PIRANHA (1978)! Tune in as we puzzle over what hungry tropical fish sound like as they murder innocent swimmers (hint: it's either birds or medical equipment) and relive the childhood trauma this film inflicted upon us. Get in the water or Paul Bartel is going to say some really disheartening things to you.

 
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Episode 330: Vicious Lips (1986)

Hot ladies! Cool tunes! Hairspray! Sand dunes! This week's episode is one Scott has long awaited and finally found a copy to inflict upon his cohosts - VICIOUS LIPS (1986). Admittedly, this is a bad movie, but dang it's got a lot to love in the first and third act... it's just that pesky middle half hour with the killer alien chasing everyone around a spaceship that mucks up what could've been a cult classic. This is why humanity created the fast forward button (which is really an anachronistic joke since we all just click further in the stream anymore anyway). Let's do space drugs and sing about lunar madness on this week's episode of Horror Movie Night!

 
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Episode 329: The Giant Claw (1957)

Look in the sky It's a bird! It's a Plane! No wait... we were right the first time. It's a big bird? Of course Matt picked a black & White movie with a giant bird puppet. It's almost like he wants to scare new co-host Kyle Kutcha off in the very first week. Tune in for us completely lambasting the insanity that is this movie and it's weirdly appealing special effects.

 
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Episode 328: Sleepaway Camp 3: Teenage Wasteland

This week, we're heading back to Camp Arawak to celebrate its rebranding (hello Camp New Horizons!) as we discuss Angela's witty murder repartee in SLEEPAWAY CAMP III: TEENAGE WASTELAND (1989). We are joined by the delightfully wicked Jacki Giorgianni of the Jersey Ghouls and The List We Missed podcasts, who wears her love for this movie like a gory badge of honor. Come for the trust exercises, stay for the funerals!
 
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Episode 327: Ravenous (1999)

It's become a tradition around here for Scott to pick what we affectionately refer to as cannibal whoopsies to celebrate (?) Thanksgiving, and the honor this year was bestowed upon the strangely comedic RAVENOUS (1999). With a cast featuring Guy Pearce, Jeffrey Jones, Robert Carlyle and David Arquette, and a score composed by Damon Albarn (Blur, Gorillaz) of all people, one would think this movie wouldn't have sunk into relative obscurity, but we're here to rekindle that fire...and then cook people-stew over it. Let's get stuffed!

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Episode 326: Funnyman (1993)

Keeping the weird pumping, we follow up suckling demons with the most crass, inscrutably British thing we've ever seen that also features Christopher Lee (and he had some wild movie credits, let us tell you) - 1994's FUNNYMAN. Want to see an insane Punch and Judy show with gore and explosions and zero script, then we've got the perfect movie for you! For everyone else, come with us as we try to understand the how and why of this naughty mess. Bring your giant codpiece btw.

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Episode 325: Necropolis (1986)

Now that we've gorged ourselves on Halloween candy, it's time to burn those infernal calories and waddaya know - Satan loves aerobic dance routines! This week, we're joined by documentarian and horror paperback collector extraordinaire Kyle Kuchta, who inflicted the Empire Pictures headscratcher NECROPOLIS (1986) on us. We try valiantly to explain the plot and not freak out too much about the infamous suckling demons scene. It's November, let's get weird!

 
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Episode 324: The Addams Family (1991)

Ya boys at Horror Movie Night (obviously) love Halloween, and we insist on watching spooky kids' movies to celebrate. With that in mind, how have we gone this long without discussing 1991's THE ADDAMS FAMILY?! Besides Beetlejuice, this has got to be the most influential spooky movie from our childhoods, and arguably anyone's childhood who grew up in the 90s. Long story short, it's a perfect movie and we got to spend a full episode basking in nostalgia. Cara mia...
 
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Episode 323: Halloween 6 - The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)

It's time to finally ruin our favorite holiday by watching our least favorite entry into the Halloween franchise! No, not the Rob Zombie ones, the Paul Rudd one - HALLOWEEN 6: THE CURSE OF MICHAEL MYERS (1995). This one has been gaining cult popularity over the last few years for some unfathomable reason, and we're ready for the flame war our discussion is sure to incite. Just like the Shape, we're basically impervious to fire... and any sort of suitable ending to a film.
 
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Episode 322: Puppet Master (1989)

If there's one thing our fearless leader Matt is wary of, it's killer toys. Facing these miniature menaces head-on, we break down our love for the first Full Moon release, PUPPET MASTER (1989). Where else would we find a pair of sex psychics, a grieving widow and a doll that vomits leeches? Nowhere, that's where! As Gavin Rossdale once said, it's the little things that kill.
 
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Episode 321: Ginger Snaps (2000)

Spooky season is in full swing, and what better time than now to finally learn a bit about the female reproductive system! Joining us to discuss the werewolf cult classic GINGER SNAPS (2000) is comedian and 91 Donkey Lane tenant Robert Bacon. We wax poetic about lycanthropy, count dead dogs, and critique Canadian fashion sense. This episode is a must-listen, period! 
 
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Episode 320: Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988)

Now that Listener Submitted Month has concluded we needed to a bonafide win with the 1980's classic Killer Klowns from Outer Space. We talk about all the reasons why we find this film to still be a comedic classic and debate if there's some subtle things in there we missed the first 50 times we watched it.
 
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Episode 319: Castle Freak (1995)

Rounding out Listener Submitted Month, we're taking a trip to see our old friend Richard Band with a film no one can believe we had yet to discuss in our first 6 years of the show - 1995's CASTLE FREAK. Jeffrey Combs and Barbara Crampton reunite at the Band castle for family trouble and way more peeping tom shots than necessary to get the point across. Share the bother with your hosts this week on Horror Movie Night!

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Episode 318: Slugs (1988)

For our third Listener Submitted Month pick, we get slimy with one of the most harmless but ultimately still gross bugs out there, the salt-despising American/Spanish splatterfest SLUGS (1988). What it lacks in quality ADR, it makes up for with buckets of blood and goo, exactly what one would expect from such a bluntly-titled movie. Grab your salad spinner for this episode of Horror Movie Night, you're going to need it!

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Episode 317: Stepfather III (1996)

Continuing our Listener Submitted Month, we dive into a made-for-tv sequel that asks the question, "How much crime television should you let your wheelchair-bound child watch before they use MS Paint to figure out you're actually a face-swapped killer with two previous movies (and marriages) under your belt?" We're not sure, but we don't think THE STEPFATHER 3 (1992) truly answers the question, but it seems like its young protagonist will ace all of his STEM classes this year.

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Episode 316: The Faculty (1998)

It's September and we have relinquished control of our movie picks to you for Listener Submitted Month, and we're kicking it off with some classic millennium horror as we discuss THE FACULTY (1999)! It's got high school cliques, it's got a heartthrob cast, it's got aliens, it's even got a killer soundtrack - what's there not to love? Class is in session and your teacher is killer!

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Episode 315: An American Werewolf in London (1981)

Much has been said about AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON (1981) but not by ya boiz in HMN and since it's the 40 year anniversary of it, Matt decided it was the one and only time it'd be appropriate for our show. While the film and its creator are pretty problematic to put it nicely, AWIL is an important film for the genre and we tried our best to focus on that. And the lack of hanging dong, because of course.

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Episode 314: Pterodactyl Woman from Beverly Hills

It's Troma but you'll never guess which Kelly Brother picked this week's movie: PTERODACTYL WOMAN FROM BEVERLY HILLS (1996)! Beverly D'Angelo somehow gives it her all in what is basically a Mad-Libs title, script and overall concept. She squawks, she talks (to whales), she has sex with her very accepting husband - this movie's got it all! Plus a lot of very uncomfortable redface. Quite a mixed bag, to be sure.

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Episode 313: House by the Cemetery (1981)

We're heading back to that weird place where Spanish and American production companies go to make b-horror but boom mics are forbidden there... That's right, we're going to spend a night in THE HOUSE BY THE CEMETERY (1981), Fulci's final entry in his Gates of Hell trilogy! Surprisingly picked by Scott (but makes total sense once explained), we can definitely say we dig this one, six feet deep!

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Episode 312: Attack of the Killer Tomaotes (1978)

We had a good run with a streak of good movies, but it's time to come back to reality and consider what it would be like to get mauled by fruit pissed off that humans keep calling them vegetables, dammit! We're talking the nigh-unwatchable cult classic ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES (1978) this week, and will be fining anyone who doesn't sing the title in their heads as they read it. Don't think we don't know which of you are posers, we know, and we're going to sing about it. Badly.

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Episode 311: Shaun of the Dead (2004)

Horror comedies are typically polarizing, but we wanted to do some self-care this week and discuss one of the most well-loved ones and not worry about getting eaten alive by the Internet for once. We're shambling down to the Winchester for a pint with SHAUN OF THE DEAD (2004), as Brian continues his streak of picking actual good movies. This episode could also be titled "Compliments about Shaun of the Dead," just some fair warning there.

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Episode 310: Wishmaster (1997)

Have you ever found a magic lamp, released the genie inside and considered ITS feelings before making your paltry little wishes?? Doubtful, you selfish jerks. We here at Horror Movie Night are considerate wishmakers, and would probably only get turned to stone or something by an evil djinn instead of having our faces eaten by magic snakes. We're talking WISHMASTER (1997) this week, and what a wonderfully dumb movie it is. If you like special effects and hate logical storytelling, this one's for you!

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Episode 309: Invasion of the Saucer Men (1957)

If there's one thing aliens hate, it's sober humans... is the tagline that this week's movie should've gone with. Listen to us wrangle some little green rascals with Matt's pick of 1957's INVASION OF THE SAUCER MEN! It's chock full of all the things you loved about the 50s: wise guys, cool cars, casual misogyny and UFOs. Let's go necking!

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Episode 308: You're Next (2011)

Come with us one decade into the past, when dead mom jokes were the epitome of horror comedy humor, and we wait out the home invasion sensibilities of YOU'RE NEXT (2011). Brian has been seemingly chomping at the bit to discuss this one, and Matt and Scott have no qualms with him picking something that ISN'T 70s grindhouse for once...

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Episode 307: Death Machine (1994)

Ever wanted to see Brad Dourif in a steampunk horror movie? Well you're in luck because in 1994 such a film was produced. Apparently it was controversial for excessive violence which means that it's got Horror Movie Night written all over it! This week we look into the futuristic 2003 and see what happens when a mad scientist gets fired!
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Episode 306: Vampire's Kiss (1988)

This week on the podcast Matt makes us suffer through the "acting" of Nic Cage. Somehow this film is the actors favorite performance of his but ultimate the film tries to be more "Symbolic" than it actually is.
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Episode 305: Alice Sweet Alice (1976)

In our continued quest to finally discuss classic early slashers, we're back this week with the deliciously blasphemous Catholi-killer ALICE, SWEET ALICE (1976)! There's a lot going on in this one and it's got style for days, so we do our absolute best to go on tangent after tangent because we really just can't help ourselves. Let's kill some churchgoers and blame it on a child!
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Episode 304: The Prowler (1981)

Some guys really don't take rejection well... Case in point, the killer in this week's episode where we discuss the classic Savini splatterfest THE PROWLER (1981)! It's graduation time and you know these 26 year old high school graduates just gotta get drunk and bump uglies, but sadly for them, the only penetration they'll be experiencing is a trench spike through the skull or a pitchfork through the ribs. Let's matriculate together on another episode of Horror Movie Night!
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Episode 303: Mars Attacks (1996)

This week, Matt pleads his case to the court of public opinion on what film deserves the title of "Best Movie Made From a Short-Lived Trading Card Series" and subjects everyone to the wet fart of a CGI-fest that is MARS ATTACKS! (1996) If the special effects were bad in the 90s, they sure haven't gotten any better in the years since, but there is a certain hokey charm to the concept behind this one, so let's ACK ACK about it!
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Episode 302: Nothing But Trouble (1991)

There are terrible people in Hollywood and then there are gentle souls like Dan Aykroyd, who want so badly to make a passion project that they direct their own movie even as the male lead tries everything in his power to implode the movie. NOTHING BUT TROUBLE (1991) is an absolute mess - perfect for a lively discussion here on the show! We have nice things to say about it and none of that includes Chevy Chase, who was a total doucher on set and off. Eat it, Griswold!
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Episode 301: Don't Panic (1989)

Very seldom does a movie so purely stupid, so incredibly inept, and so confusingly charming come along that your boys at Horror Movie Night have never even heard of it, but this week, Shudder brings us a lost gem from times past that we could not deny. DON'T PANIC (1988) aka ADR THE MOVIE is one of the worst NOES ripoffs ever made, but so delightful in its ineptitude. Every choice made was the wrong one and we're so glad we got a chance to watch it because this episode is louder than the female lead's eyebrows.
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Episode 300: Pee Wee's Big Adventure (1985)

HOLY EXPLETIVE, WE MADE IT TO EPISODE 300! To celebrate (almost) 6 years of HMN behind us, we decided to go on an adventure. A big one, to be exact - PEE-WEE'S BIG ADVENTURE (1985) which, as other millenials know, is straight kindertrauma. Plus it's got Large Marge, killer clowns, and Elvira out of costume. Let's celebrate all the way to Warner Bros' studio lot!

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Episode 299: Creature Walks Among Us (1956)

You know what's REALLY scary? A fish-man wearing sensible human clothing. Especially when said fish-man is swole AF. We're diving into the deep end of the Black Lagoon and coming up for air with THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US (1956). This is one of the wildest concepts for a golden age horror movie and definitely worth discussing Creature's fitness routine cuz dayum!

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Episode 298: Day of the Dead (1985)

We typically avoid zombie movies on Horror Movie Night because frankly, they're pretty boring. Brian must have missed that memo somehow and picked DAY OF THE DEAD (1985), the zombie movie that spawned all of the tropes that boring zombie movies that followed have used in the vain efforts to show that pEoPlE tHaT aRe ThE rEaL mOnStErS. Fun fact, did you know that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, the surviving people are going to be the real jerks? Crazy, right?? Bub the zombie, shoot us now.

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Episode 297: Thirteen Ghosts (2001)

Did someone say "more Matthew Lillard"? Well you're in lucky then, because we're doing back to back Lillard love on the show with another Dark Castle outing - THIR13EN GHOSTS (2001)! The fun of this movie has absolutely nothing to do with the plot, the script or the acting, and everything to do with these sweet ghost designs. And hey Dark Castle, if you're listening, we've got some dope prequel/sequel pitches for you on this episode if you're looking to cash in on the cult following this one may or may not have. Call us?

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Episode 296: Serial Mom (1994)

John Waters is the kind of writer/director who makes comedies for horror fans, but we rarely get a chance to talk about them because his notoriety far outweighs his actual filmography. Luckily, we have SERIAL MOM (1994) that's as close to straight up horror as Mr. Waters gets and therefore is fair game for the Kelly boys. It's got quotes, it's got murder, it's got Matthew Lillard. Of COURSE we're discussing it!

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Episode 295: Bride of Chucky (1998)

Brian's a tough nut to crack. He didn't like DOLLS (1987) but he's a massive fan of BRIDE OF CHUCKY (1998)... We forgive him because at least he's picking better movies so far this year. You truly can't go wrong with Jennifer Tilly playing Jennifer Tilly's #1 fan and Brad Dourif being, well, Brad Dourif. You know we only have good things to say about this one, it's just a feel-good party this week on Horror Movie Night!

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Teen Flick Movie Night - Episode 294: Whatever It Takes

It's time for another ska-riffic time here on Teen Flick Movie Night, and this week we're finally tackling that titan of high school humor, 2000s WHATEVER IT TAKES! Boasting a pretty illustrious cast including that guy from Breaking Bad, the Green Goblin's son, the Green Goblin's son's real-life girlfriend, the guy Sean Connery taught how to shoot in League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, the manager from Waiting, the ultimate 90s movie hot girl, and Stoner Guy. Time for some MAYHEM!

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Episode 293: Jack Brooks Monster Slayer (2008)

If you ever find yourself wondering why a movie starring Robert Englund didn't do well and if it might be some forgotten gem, let us tell you that there are very good reasons why such films have been relegated to the dustbin of horror history; case in point, this week's pick - JACK BROOKS MONSTER SLAYER (2007). While not completely unwatchable, it's definitely not worth any sort of cult status... Your gracious hosts take the hit for you once more, all while humming that classic Bobby Darin hit "Beyond the Sea."

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Episode 292: Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master (1988)

Strap in this week when we dive into the most financially successful but most middle of the road of the Elm Street movies. Dream Master contains one of the greatest kills in Nightmare history but does the rest of the film hold up to the quality of that Roach kill? Well ya boys in HMN are happy to do God's work and find out for you.

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Episode 291: House of the Devil (2009)

Ti West is that kind of movie-maker whose entire reputation stems from one absolutely amazing film, and this week we're heading back in time to spend a night at THE HOUSE OF THE DEVIL (2009). Listen to us wax poetic on set dressings and frames per second, it's riveting!

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Episode 290: Disturbing Behavior (1998)

Do you like Kurt Vonnegut? How we haven't asked this question of you in 289 episodes is absolutely insane, but this week we're finally discussing DISTURBING BEHAVIOR (1998) and we expect an honest answer. If your answer is no, though, we may call you Cook's Ridge Trash.

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Episode 289: The Deadly Mantis (1957)

We warned you that this was the year we live our truths via movie picks, and Matt is holding up his end of the bargain with THE DEADLY MANTIS (1957)! The man loves his giant animal monster movies, and this is arguably the film that got him hooked (or rather, the orange book at the library about it but you get the idea). Grab the Raid, it's go time!

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Episode 288: Superstition (1983)

Do you hear that? Is that... Stevie Wonder? That funky bassline can only mean one thing - we're delving into SUPERSTITION (1982) this week! Somehow this one flew under the radar for all three of your hosts and this is a rare first-time watch for us all. Don't misunderstand, this movie is not good, but damn is it a fun ride.

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Episode 287: My Bloody Valentine (1981)

Do you like Dream Warriors? Of course you do! That doesn't necessarily mean you'll enjoy this movie, but you'll at least enjoy the movie it copied. This week, we're talking about BAD DREAMS (1988) which boasts a (b-level) star-studded cast, a threadbare script and BLOOD SHOWERS FOR EVERYBODY. Come on in, it's a perfect 98 degrees!

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Episode 286: Bad Dreams (1988)

Do you like Dream Warriors? Of course you do! That doesn't necessarily mean you'll enjoy this movie, but you'll at least enjoy the movie it copied. This week, we're talking about BAD DREAMS (1988) which boasts a (b-level) star-studded cast, a threadbare script and BLOOD SHOWERS FOR EVERYBODY. Come on in, it's a perfect 98 degrees!

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Episode 285: Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976)

In the most Brian pick of the last 12 months, we head to Texarkana and visit THE TOWN THAT DREADED SUNDOWN (1974). Is this movie an unrealistic take on an actual rash of murders? Yes. Does its tone change more than a MySpace model's hair? Yes. Is it good? Well, we're not entirely sure, but we think... maybe? Listen to us hash it out this week on Horror Movie Night!

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Episode 284: Fright Night (2011)

Remember what we said last week about questionable content? It's back in full force with Matt's first official pick of 2021, 1980's FADE TO BLACK. If you like bad Cagney and Monroe impressions, boy do we have a movie for you! It's not good, but at least we got to talk about that sweet TOURIST TRAP poster in the first 10min of the movie.

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Episode 283: Fade to Black (1980)

Remember what we said last week about questionable content? It's back in full force with Matt's first official pick of 2021, 1980's FADE TO BLACK. If you like bad Cagney and Monroe impressions, boy do we have a movie for you! It's not good, but at least we got to talk about that sweet TOURIST TRAP poster in the first 10min of the movie.

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Episode 282: Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)

New year, same questionable content choices EXCEPT FOR THIS WEEK, as we always put our first movie of the year up to a group vote in our Facebook group, and the group has spoken: "we want more Rick Moranis!"
Ask and you shall receive, as well as some delightful Matt Frewer craziness and tons of sweet practical effects. Get lost in the backyard with us as we ride ants and fight scorpions in 2021!